Randomly wondering How i’d feel if i read your obituary
We think of epic love stories like Romeo and Juliette, sometimes we even hope against all hope that we will find this. We dream up the perfect happily ever after, and time after time reality crashes around us. The people who weren’t supposed to let us down, usually do. Is there ever an epic love? where you offer your heart, and sell your soul? you sacrifice, and hope and dream and you never let go… but they do.
There has always been something in the way, some obstacle i had to get over, another hurdle to jump, another stone in my shoe, another skinned knee… mostly the obstacle was you. There have been excuses, and miles, and unsent postcard that were hand delivered. Unshed tears saved until they turned into a failed tempest in a storm – a storm in a teacup is what you were. When the world fell down around us, you crumbled with it, taking sanity down with you and screaming into my thoughts to intimidate me. Character fills up the places we leave empty in a difficult situation. Stuck between a rock and a hard place, i wish for once you could have been my rock and ground, instead you sold me out to save yourself… again.
This morning i wiped up the blood you spilled on my life
Fear makes you run,
but some people trip over their own feet when running
Uncomfortable situations make us masters of our demons, yet the scary realisation of having the armour stripped down leaving us bare, with volatile emotions and the desperate yelling of our souls.
I feel i betrayed you. Taking you to a stranger to expose your flaws.
And yet again i see someone i thought existed only in my nightmares
We obliterate our secrets,
blotting the out against reality,
putting up our armour so the world doesn’t see our inner demons,
we walk on a guided path, still getting lost on the way,
and praying for God to give us a miracle, and sometimes to undo the wrongs we’ve inflicted on our own souls.
Despite the blind faith and desperate hope, we seek comfort in this…
Never actualizing that time won’t bring back anything, or anyone
There is always a need for retrospection.
It assimilates our perception of life, and the way forward
The pitter patter of footsteps sometimes replace the sound of ones biological clock ticking
There’s a blurry reality amidst the fiction